Beloved actor and comedian Marlon Wayans had a hilarious response to the recent burglary of his Los Angeles-area home. When thieves reportedly made off with a safe and several thousand dollars in cash, Marlon took to Instagram to set the record straight.
In a video posted on Thursday, Marlon thanked those who reached out to him after the incident, but assured everyone that the thieves “didn’t really get much.” With his signature humor, Marlon declared, “The most valuable thing in my house is my house. So unless you’re gonna put that shit on a truck and drag it away, then hey man, you did well but I don’t own shit.”
Marlon went on to reveal that he doesn’t own any jewelry, proudly showing off a “fake” ring that turned out to be a heart rate monitor. “I’m not flashy. No jewelry. No necklaces. I don’t have cash. I use credit cards,” he explained.
In a caption accompanying the video, Marlon reassured fans that he and his family are doing “fine” and expressed gratitude for their support. He even joked about his 1994 Range Rover, warning potential robbers that the battery was dead and they would need a jumpstart if they tried to steal it.
In typical Marlon Wayans fashion, he ended his message with a humorous plea to thieves to choose a different target: “Robbers don’t waste your energy or your life doing home invasions, shit is too heavy!!! You want to carry all that bullshit? Throw your back out, and for what?! I repeat I don’t own shit valuable. I don’t have a bunch of cash or jewelry. Please pick a better 🎯 thank you and love you… still.”
Despite the burglary, Marlon’s positive attitude and sense of humor shine through, proving once again that he’s not only a talented entertainer but also a master of handling life’s curveballs with grace and wit.